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The Mystery

I am quoting from the New Living Translation of the Bible:

“But be very careful! You did not see the Lord’s form on the day He spoke to you from the heart of the fire at Mount Sinai. So do not corrupt yourselves by making an idol in any form – whether of a man or a woman, an animal on the ground, a bird in the sky, a small animal that scurries along the ground, or a fish in the deepest sea…Remember that the Lord rescued you from the iron-smelting furnace of Egypt in order to make you his very own people and his special possession, which is what you are today…” -Deuteronomy 4:15,16,17,18,20*

If you’re like me, what you just read made your heart skip a beat and begin to run through a list of questions such as:

  • Is there an idol in my life?
  • What is it? My car? boyfriend? husband? job? wife?
  • Have I been so intensely unaware of such a serious problem for a long time?

And on and on. For some of you reading right now, you need to seriously ponder those questions and reevaluate some situations where you are placing something or someone above God. For some of you, I am going to go in a different route. Before fear eats you alive, consider this: is Your Lord mysterious to you? or do you feel like you know Him completely?

Maybe you wouldn’t be so bold as to verbally express something you know is blatantly unbiblical (Romans 11:33-35, Isaiah 55:8-11 etc.) but maybe He has become familiar to you or you feel like you’ve learned enough to live well today.

I think I have experienced what was going on with the Pharisees that attacked Jesus (not all Pharisees are evil). Knowledge can make you feel like an expert. If, for instance, you are someone that grew up in a Christian home, heard the bible stories in Sunday school, and endeavored to read the bible everyday, there’s a point at which you can start feeling like you know “enough God” yet He has given us a lifetime to get to know Him and to uncover His mystery and that is worship.

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10 things

I am so thankful

1. For wonderful Christian music. It keeps my mind on God and on His goodness. It brings me unexpected happiness and is usually timely.

2. For a wonderful friend like Ife who is always there for me. In fact, I had so many wonderful people in my life who take me under their wing like Chet or listen to me when life is hard like Allie; friends who encourage me just by following hard after God like Tonell; friends who exude purity that  inspires me like Ashley Hoff.

3. For a mother that prays… she prays so hard. I think about her and how grateful I am for her love that it makes me want to weep. She loves so hard. She is so good to me. God made her so good and gave me such an amazing gift in her.

4. For a sister that is my soul mate. I love her deeply. She and I understand each other. She inspires me to be awesome. She inspires me to be better than today and to never give up when things get hard. She has taught me “it’s possible.”

5. For a father that provides. He has taught me so much. I inherited so much of my spirit from him and I didn’t even know. He is a good man and I love him with all my heart. He is my world.

6. For Jesus… You walk with me. I love You. Saying “thank You” is not enough. I would die for You. You are my life. I was nothing before You but now I feel richer than I could have ever dreamed to be.

7. For dreams and visions. I am thankful for the ability to see a tomorrow that is deeper and more glorious than today. I am thankful for the undeserved blessing of being able to see beauty in the chaos and purpose in the messes of life. That has been getting me through this very difficult year and I thank the Holy Spirit for that gift.

8. For beauty. It adds something unquantifiable to my soul.

9. For imagination. Once, I thought it was a weakness. Now I know it is a strength. We can create anything. Music, art, websites, novels, sermons… we can think through life and learn and see and grow. God made us so dynamic. Studying programming has made me realize how complicated we are. Creating intelligence like us… too much. I know a lot of people say we shouldn’t think so highly of ourselves but saying that we are like highly sophisticated programs is an understatement. We are so advanced and so complicated and it’s because God is the master designer.

10. For trials. They clear the crap out of my view and all I see is “naori” (My Lord).

Une vie Pierreuse

(SG21) MATTHIEU 13:1 Ce jour-là, Jésus sortit de la maison et s’assit au bord du lac. La foule se rassembla autour de lui, si nombreuse qu’il monta dans une barque où il s’assit. Toute la foule se tenait sur le rivage. Il leur parla en paraboles sur beaucoup de choses. Il dit: «Un semeur sortit pour semer. Comme il semait, une partie de la semence tomba le long du chemin; les oiseaux vinrent et la mangèrent. Une autre partie tomba dans un sol pierreux où elle n’avait pas beaucoup de terre; elle leva aussitôt, parce qu’elle ne trouva pas un terrain profond, mais quand le soleil parut, elle fut brûlée et sécha, faute de racines.

Quand ma vie est “pierreuse,” c’est difficille à lire la Bible, prier ou louer Dieu regulièrement et profondement parce que je suis trop occupée avec des autres pensées.

Je lisais cette parabole quand j’ai réalisée (à nouveau) que c’est important à être établi sur les paroles de Dieu. C’est à cause de ça que Paul a dit,

(SG21) ÉPHÉSIENS 3:17 … Je prie que vous soyez enracinés et fondés dans l’amour 18 pour être capables de comprendre avec tous les saints quelle est la largeur, la longueur, la profondeur et la hauteur de l’amour de Christ, 19 et de connaître cet amour qui surpasse toute connaissance, afin que vous soyez remplis de toute la plénitude de Dieu.

(Rappellez-vous que Dieu est l’amour – c.f. 1 Jean 4:16) Il est intéressant parce que pour être “remplis de toute la plénitude de Dieu”, on doit être déjà enracinés dans l’amour mais ça c’est difficille si les paroles de Jésus ne sont pas dans le cœur (autrement: si on n’est pas remplis de toute la plénitude de Dieu).

En fin, sans la grâce de Dieu, il est impossible à le connaître; et si par sa grâce, il nous a sauvé mais nous ne reçevons pas ses dons, il ne reste rien à faire.

(SG21) HÉBREUX 10:26 En effet, si nous péchons volontairement après avoir reçu la connaissance de la vérité, il ne reste plus de sacrifice pour les péchés.

La salut continue avec une prière quotidien.

Abaji,

I will think about You day and night. I thank You for Your love and for Your faithfulness.

When times are hard, I will not sink into self-pity; I will lift up my eyes to You and contemplate your goodness.

Your peace will carry me through the days of fear and dread.

I will not give up and allow my heart be weakened by panic. I will be strengthened by singing songs of praise and going daily into Your presence.

Tu es mon soutien; tu es mon appui.

Je vais rester toujours dans ta présence, Chère Père.

Je vais faire confiance en toi car tu es toujours merveilleux.

Tu es toujours là dans mes nuits flippants et quand la vie est dur.

Je te remercie pour ta bonté. Je t’aime pour ton amour.

Work Ethic

I’ve found a bug in my garden. I’ve known it for quite some time but now I think I care.

I was one of those people that didn’t really get told to work hard in school because a lot of it came to me pretty easily right up until I graduated high school so all I got was “keep up the good work!” which I did. I kept waiting till the last minute to study, not taking the initiative to go to teachers for extra help, and praying like a beast for a miracle at the midnight hour.

Looking back on it, I think it was, in parts:

  • due to the act that I wasn’t working at the same time
  • due to the fact that I was living with my social circle
  • and in part, due to the fact that I was living in countries where education systems weren’t as fast-paced and stressful as the United States’ (you guys win a prize for not knowing how to slow down – seriously – I need to move to France or something)

So, college happened and I had to

  • Eventually get a job to support my habits such as having a cellphone
  • Make an extra effort to hang out with my friends
  • Learn how to not be friends with everyone
  • Go through puberty
  • Be stressed out all the time due to my weak time-management skills

Fun Times!

Somehow, (I think it was due to praying like a beast at the midnight hour and just plain providence) I graduated, got into graduate school, got an assistantship, and began really living on my own ALL, might I add, without without developing any sort of passion to work hard like all the other cool kids.

As far as I was concerned, I was made for programming and programming was made for me. It worked sort of like magic in my head… like destiny even. I think my desire to keep things pure and not mess with nature really plays into this. For instance, when I write a song, I will go with my first inspiration and most likely not refine my lyrics or my melody because it came like that. It’s as if the song had a life of its own and it graced me with its presence. My job was not to improve it or to make it better. My job was to receive it and share it.

I am somewhat of a purist.

it’s a good thing

Triclosan shouldn’t be in my system so I use regular natural soap instead of special antibacterial soap (which does the same thing but BETTER) and I don’t get sick anymore. Simple.

it’s a bad thing

Being a purist can make you very accepting of the way things currently are which means you can develop a tendency to be complacent rather than actually fighting for good change. I am talking about attitudes I have noticed in myself.

On the road of self-discovery…

Now, I was going to end there and post this without even proofreading. Why? Because I write the same way I talk.

“The thought is alive. Let it be free. It has happened. Don’t try to micro-manage it.”

My words don’t even belong to me. I am a mouthpiece for expression. I like that about myself but is it always a good thing?

Normally I would not even answer the question in the name of poetic expression but this time, I respond with a solid NO!.

Dear purist (future Buki),

it’s okay to get dirty every now and then (depending on the situation).

Connect

Today, I met a man named John.

Or Jon? Peut-être Jean… João… Johann… Johanu…

We had one of those one in a lifetime conversations.

We talked about spirits… hate… mercy… naturalism… religion… guilt-complexes… healing.

I believe souls with similar carvings find their way to each other somehow,

I believe that Jesus is in the middle, and a circle is made.

 

Facebook-free, we sat face-to-face and connected.

No numbers were exchanged, no emails, nothing but hope and connection.

The only thing that might reconnect us in the future is the divine will of God.

 

I said, “So, shall we run into each other again?”

“Yes”

He who has ears & eyes…

This earth is and always has been an opportunity to become more like our Holy God (Who is Love). It was not supposed to be this complicated or dark but we all know what happened in Genesis 3 when man met snake.

In my life, I have realized that God lights a fire big enough to purify me but not big enough to burn me up (Malachi 3:1-4; 1 Corinthians 10:10-14)  and you know why it doesn’t burn me up? Even though this world is not all as it should be, Christ came. He took  the load of our sin (Isaiah 59:2) leaving us only with grace (Isaiah 53:1-3). So now, I can meet with God and that changes everything (John 14:17-18, 14:26).

Every war is an opportunity to make peace the way God would (Matt 5:9). Every homeless person is an opportunity to provide shelter the way God would (Isaiah 58:7). Every hungry person is an opportunity to feed the 4000-5000 like Jesus would (Mark 8:1-13; Matthew 14:10-21).

So don’t look at the world like some sort of glorious mistake. When we were planted here, we were given a divine call to be responsible for what happens here. Instead of waiting on God to come do what He’s already called us to do, why don’t we rise into our calling to affect the world for the better?

Incomplete

[AMP]PHIL 3:10[For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [[b]which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope]

11That if possible I may attain to the [[c]spiritual and moral] resurrection [that lifts me] out from among the dead [even while in the body].

What does it mean to attain?

Attain carries the connotation that we don’t just wake up day and have our goal but that each day we wake up, we have acquired just a little bit more of what we hope to have more abundantly one  day.

I think we miss out on that perspective if we are perfectionists. Perfectionists cannot deal with the middle time – the time when things are incomplete; imperfect; not quite shiny enough.

Here is how Paul encourages me (continuing in the above chapter):

12Not that I have now attained [this ideal], or have already been made perfect, but I press on to lay hold of (grasp) and make my own, that for which Christ Jesus (the Messiah) has laid hold of me and made me His own.

13I do not consider, brethren, that I have captured and made it my own [yet]; but one thing I do [it is my one aspiration]: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,

14I press on toward the goal to win the [supreme and heavenly] prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward.

Or as Joyce Meyer would say: “I’m not where I need to be but thank God I’m not where I used to be. I’m okay and I’m on my way.”

Praise God for that revelation. The believer bound up in fear, guilt and regret is ineffective (stuck). When we walk by grace, on the other hand, we continue to grow despite our imperfections, our incompleteness, and our lackluster state.

Remember, You cannot get to the finish line without running the race. You cannot get to perfection without passing through imperfection. There is no peak without a valley.

Vendredi Vraiment Vaillant

“Therefore, with minds that are alert and fully sober, set your hope on the grace to be brought to you when Jesus Christ is revealed at his coming.” – 1 Peter 1:13[niv]

There’s something to be said about sober minds in a dark  world. It is hard to have. Sometimes, I think our emotions can be a coating and cause us to act against reality/common-sense.

Last night, I watched “The girl with the dragon tattoo.” Almost walked out twice but I knew there had to be a reason I was there.[Spoiler alert] At one point during the main writer’s investigation, he figured out that the killer was someone he knew and he went to the killer’s house  to investigate. The killer  came back home and the writer ran out the back door. When spotted, the killer invited him in for a drink. The  was an insidious look in his eye but our dear writer obliged.

Cut to the basement and our writer is now awkwardly strapped to a neck brace device. Anyway, the killer makes his speech and says something that really impacts me: “Why don’t people trust their instincts?” he asked smugly. “You knew I was the killer and yet you did not decline my invitation in.” He explained that sometimes, people’s desire not to offend will get them  in situations that they know will cause them pain.

I saw that theme over and over again in the movie. We knew what was about to happen and sensed that it could somehow be stopped but our hero or heroin was not suspicious enough.

It’s the same thing that happens when a woman knows a certain man is watching her in an alarming way but she doesn’t report anything to the police because  suspicions are not evidence enough and she is worried that she might offend either the man watching her or the police officers that are going to have to investigate the incident.

I want to submit that suspicions are a form of evidence. Please  believe that if you suspect something, you have a reason. Something is out of the ordinary and it might be more than you think. Don’t toss it out in the name of fear. Perhaps that’s the reason why we won’t ask a friend what’s wrong even when we  know that something is out of the ordinary (in the name of avoiding offense).

Stop and think… “Why do I think this?” Pray for guidance. Do what makes the most sense and don’t let offense be your reason for setting your mind to the sidelines and allowing a problem to aggregate.

8 Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [[f]in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour.

9 Withstand him; be firm in faith [against his onset--rooted, established, strong, immovable, and determined], knowing that the same ([g]identical) sufferings are appointed to your brotherhood (the whole body of Christians) throughout the world.” – 1 Peter 5[amp]

Our  worst mistake is thinking that we do not have an enemy. Pretending the problem isn’t there is NOT going to make it go away. Vigilance demands that we do not  treat ourselves like we’re crazy just because we’re worried that someone might not believe us or that we might offend somebody.

Submit your minds to God everyday and pray for Him to lead you.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/valiant

Vraiment Vaillant Vendredi

He is the Last

I feel like we complain about the things we suffer but Jesus is at the bottom of this pyramid holding us up. (Colossians 1:17) It’s not to trivialize your struggles but to say fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame and is now seated at the right hand of God, the Father. Consider Him who endured so much from sinful men so that you will not grow weary and loose heart. (I just basically quoted Hebrews 12:2-3)

His life always has been and is to this day about serving all of us (Mark 10:43-45).

He is the last. (Revelation 22:13)

And one day, the last shall be the first. (Mark 10:31)

So spend yourself… if you want to be like Jesus (Isaiah 58:10)

He’s not standing aloof, yelling at us from the sidelines to deal with it. He speaks truth yesterday, today, forever. He knows and has experienced the full extent of humanity plus an added bonus as its creator. (John 1:10-11; Hebrews 4:15-16)

The last to get married. (Revelation 19:7)

The last to drink the cup of wine. (Matthew 26:29)

The last to sacrifice his life for us.(Hebrews 10:10-12)

The last…

worLd CHANGERS

The people that changed our world were merchants of ideas;

connoisseurs of words like a gale force

moving the hearts of people in one direction

toward darkness…

toward light;

A mouthpiece for a cause;

A prophet inspired by a dream.

So if you do speak,

speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;

speak up and judge fairly

and defend the rights of the poor and needy.

mental slavery

MENTAL slavery is a severe form of it.

They walk around convinced they are free

But their chains are made up of horses’ tails.

Their whips are steeped in hydroquinone.

Wishing away melanin, mercury is now condoned.

Dangerous seed are still being sown -moving through generations.

They live for today but the inevitable is drawing near.

He beats her, insults her, looks down on her

and her soul, so tied up,

begins to echo his remarks.

Death is knocking on the door.

Wake up, O sleeper!

Rise from the dead

and Christ will shine on you.

Adul-atry

Mark 10:11-12 msg}Jesus gave it to them straight: “A man who divorces his wife so he can marry someone else commits adultery against her. And a woman who divorces her husband so she can marry someone else commits adultery.”

Adultery is so much deeper than I thought.  The mere heart condition of abandoning your spouse for the prospect of something better is adultery.

In other words, we usually don’t consider it cheating until you can see the 3rd person in the love triangle but now, I’m starting to think it takes on a deeper shape.

The moment your heart abandons your spouse for another – whether that person has take on a physical form  or is merely a desire [figment of the imagination] – your heart has wandered and adultery has occurred because >>> will you not jump at the first opportunity to be with someone who fulfills those fantasies?

Idolatry has been described in scripture as SPIRITUAL ADULTERY (prime example – the book of Hosea).

The moment your mind/heart/body says, “I want something more satisfying than God” and you begin to pull away from Him in your heart, idolatry has occurred. SIN has occurred.

Mark 10:15 msg}Mark this: Unless you accept God’s kingdom in the simplicity of a child, you’ll never get in.”

The adult in you will look for loopholes in this. The child will pray, “Let me be faithful to You, my Love.”

So let it be 예수

the sacrifice

PROVERBS 21:3[NIV]

To do what is right and just 

is more acceptable to the LORD than sacrifice.

-King Solomon

I was l led to read this a lot when I first became a Christian. Looking back now, I see that it was something I especially needed to hear being the kind of kid I was. I mean, my “brilliant” idea to get around God and sin was to do whatever I wanted and then ask for forgiveness. At the age of 8, I thought I had found the loophole and would make an amazing lawyer some day. I even began to pray, “Lord, forgive me for what I am about to do.” I treated God like a machine. I was trying to work the system.

One day, my sister, without knowing I had developed this habit, said, “Sinning is bad but it’s worse when you do it anyway because you know you can ask for forgiveness later.” (she probably doesn’t remember because it was really long ago and I’m surprised I even remembered it)

We humans have a habit of that, don’t we? We try to make up for our wrongs with God by praying prayers, offering sacrifices, going to church, singing a song, giving money to a good cause… I mean, we can even get super creative with it and start using props: crosses around our necks, handling our physical bibles with the utmost care (whether or not His word is hidden in our hearts)… Do you notice how everything I mentioned is actually a good thing?

 1 SAMUEL 16:7 [NIV]

 But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height,

for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at.

People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

It’s not rare for me to hear that Jesus came to cleanse us from our sins through His death on the cross.

HEBREWS 1:3[NCV]

 The Son reflects the glory of God and shows exactly what God is like. He holds everything together with his powerful word. When the Son made people clean from their sins, he sat down at the right side of God, the Great One in heaven. – Unknown

I am SO grateful for His cross and there is no amount of guilt on my part to pay for that. I have been bought by His blood and am no longer my own but His. Here’s the thing though, Him cleansing us from our sins encompasses more than His death on the cross.

MARK 1:38[NCV]

Jesus answered, “We should go to other towns around here so I can preach there too. That is the reason I came.”

His teachings form the core of our new way of thinking and living. His was is the way things were always supposed to be. Jeshua did not come down so that people could have a sacrifice they could tote around to say, “HEY! I’m clean! I’m clean!”

He came to teach people how to be  like God. We are not called to live at the place were all we can do is ask for cleansing after cleansing. He showed us how to be truly godly and gave us to power to do it by His spirit. Don’t give up hope. There is grace and that grace is strong enough to change you.

I hope you’re not like I was as a kid, simply using the sacrifice of Jesus as insurance for your sins. Be cleansed from your sins to the core of who you are so that Jesus can reign supreme in your heart.

So when you hear that Jesus came to cleanse you of your sins, think not only of forgiveness but of transformation. (I urge you to read the next verse in context if you have time).

II CONRINTHIANS 3:18[NCV]

Our faces, then, are not covered. We all show the Lord’s glory, and we are being changed to be like him. This change in us brings ever greater glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. – Paul

Love

I had one of those desire-prayers recently. It’s when you don’t actually pray but you do… it’s when your heart prays even when your mouth or mind don’t (because God listens that closely whether we realize it or not).

Love is a big deal. Every one talks about it and tries to distinguish it from lesser things like infatuation, lust, interest, like etc. Everyone is still trying to figure out what it really is; but then, there are those Christians that have somehow cracked the hard shell of the coconut that is the study of love. They have grabbed hold of some awesome revelation and they’re running around saying love is the most amazing thing they’ve ever come across.

They don’t talk about love in a jaded way nor do they talk about it in a cliche way. They do not give a Sunday School answer without depth to back up their words. I must confess, I was not one of those Christians (but I wanted to be). That was my heart-prayer. I prayed God would teach me about love and show me it’s depth. I prayed I would have an inspired understanding of this “love” and become so impacted by it that my whole life would change.

I prayed that I would not be formulaic about it. Love is patient, love is kind… trying to “do patience” and “do kindness” etc without any substance to my soul or experiential knowledge of the ins and outs of love.

Unasked, I hear Michael Buble singing, “That’s All” and a new idea emerges: He loves me… for it is the love of God that leads man to repentance… not the hate/disdain/judgement of God:

Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?

(Romans 2:4-NASB)

LOVE SYMBOL

It is not birthed out of our actions. We can only love when we see God’s love. I hope your heart prays. Love is the movement and it does mean something deep as everyone suspects. I pray I get it and I pray we all get it… and then become love.

So, like over a year ago, I was at Kroger and I saw this movie called “Faith Like Potatoes” in one of their movie bins. I ignored it because (although I am a Christian), I have a bias against Christians films and I went, “it’s probably going to be cheesy and badly acted. Besides, I’m not that crazy about potatoes. They’re adequate.” (uh! I can be such a stereotype-er sometimes).

About a month ago, I was on Netflix, surfing movies when I came across (you guessed it) “Faith Like Potatoes.” I decided to watch the trailer and see what the movie was about. I guess my Jesus-senses were tingling. I was curious. I LOVED THE TRAILER. My interest was definitely peeked so I added it to my DVD queue.

After watching the bajillion other movies in my queue, “Faith Like Potatoes” was up next but I had apparently forgotten the awesome trailer I had seen so I decided I didn’t care for the movie anymore. I tried to circumvent watching it before it was too late.

ALAS, it had already been shipped my Netflix before I could take it off my queue so I had 2 options:

  1. Simply return it as soon as it arrived
  2. Watch it, judge it, move on

I decided to watch it on Tuesday. I started during downtime at the office but 2 minutes into it, I suddenly had work to do. Those 2 minutes were all it took for my interest to be peeked again. Y’ALL, I just finished watching it and it was amazing! (it’s Friday now).

I just want to re-iterate something: when God speaks, He speaks. He obviously wanted me to see that movie. It blew my mind. I learned that much of our faith happens in the dark but we keep working and then the fruit comes. That is major trust in God. I hope you watch it. I loved it.

The Answer

So… I’m doing it. I’m falling in love with my ministry to the world/others.

It’s been a long time coming but we’re finally doing it. SO instead of being future-focused and boy-crazy and bored, I’m living. Thank God.

It’s kind of amazing because ministry is coming in ways I wouldn’t have expected. Then again, I hadn’t really thought expectations through simply because I was busy making sure I was getting fed.

Are we educated beyond our level of obedience?

(Joyce Meyer said that)

It’s coming in a church building, at a cafe, at home, online… and (again) it’s funny because it is a job in itself. You can get quite occupied with it. I wasn’t feeling stressed out (because God gives His grace where He gives His calling) but I did get a little conflicted about whether or not I was supposed to be so busy. Here’s the scripture of the day (thank you “youVersion” Bible App!):

Therefore, my beloved brethren, be firm (steadfast), immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord [always being superior, excelling, doing more than enough in the service of the Lord], knowing and being continually aware that your labor in the Lord is not futile [it is never wasted or to no purpose].

That was from 1 Corinthians 15:58 (long letter there, Paul). So, that said, a lot has been changing lately… I feel weird saying WHEN certain spiritual changes started in me (like salvation) because all things have been in Him from the start. There’s always been this thread from the very beginning and that thread is Jesus; He’s always been saving/re-creating me.

That thread existed long before me and has been permeating my whole life. it’s just that I noticed the thread at one point and then gradually began to study it and then, at another point, held on to it and to this day, I keep learning more and more about this amazing thread that holds the Universe together.

The thread continues to this day. One day, the thread led me to a church where I heard a message saying, “Be the one.” For someone that hopes to get married one day, impatience can become a pitfall. For someone living a pretty average, self-centered, bored life, it is very easy to become very dissatisfied with your today and begin to fervently wish for tomorrow.

“Being the one” is all about shifting your focus

from

“Gah! I can’t wait till I meet the perfect person and then we fall in love and get married”

to

“Whoa! Sure, that person might be in my future but if I WERE to meet them, would I even be the kind of person that is compatible with my ideal mate?”

‘Cuz I think it’s easy to wish for someone that’s kind, wise, strong, beautiful/handsome, funny, winsome… and to have all these expectations but turn the question around: are we those things ourselves? Think about it, the person you hope to fall in love with might not even be attracted to you ‘cuz you’re lazy and selfish and immature (or whatever).

And it’s funny ‘cuz it turns out I’ve heard people say that before but when God speaks, He speaks. Sometimes, I find things on the thread that have always been there but I don’t notice it for a while. Today I was watching, “Beware of Christians” and one of the guys made the point about being the one. I saw that movie way before I heard the message: “Be the one”

Shortly after the trip to that church where I heard the message (“Be the one”), Abba started to convict me. I have fallen in love with the idea of falling in love. I think it was the movie “27 dresses” that had the line:

I don’t think you want a marriage; I think you just want a wedding

but it’s been a little bit like that for me: falling in love with love but not allowing myself to realize that it is more than that. I was officially a romantic but Abba said, “Hey, fall in love with your ministry. Give that a go. Try that instead of being in love with romance.” And when I trusted Him and took His hand, He lead me to a place that I really can’t describe. He took me to Land-Ineffable. I am happy that I trusted Him. I am happy that I gave my life over. I am happy that He is my guide and I am happy that He is the thread that has always existed and will never fade out for all of time.

Be the one.

Buki.

Plans

Proverbs 16:1-3[ncv]

People may make plans in their minds, but only the Lord can make them come true.

You may believe you are doing right,
but the Lord will judge your reasons.

Depend on the Lord in whatever you do,
and your plans will succeed.

Today, I was talking to Brittney and Tonell about a dilemma I was having. I’m moving off campus next year for grad school. It’ll be my first time in an apartment of my own because I’ve spent the last 4.5 years in a dorm (partly because I was too young and because I became an RA). I remember going to visit one of my friends in her condo and really liking it and I always had this glorified memory of that house. I thought to myself, “If I ever move off campus, I want a place like THAT.”

Desire.

When I realized I would need an apartment, another Britney told me she would let me sublease hers because she was going to be transferring to another school.

Opportunity.

I put that condo out of my mind because I thought I would never get it (I mean, what was I going to do? kick the residents out?). Then all of a sudden, it seemed like my dream was coming true because I ran into one of the friends that lived in that condo and she said, “Hey, I’m moving out next year if you want to rent our condo.”

Choice.

So I went back with a potential roommate and looked at the condo. It didn’t seem to look like it did when I first saw it. I was looking at it with fresh eyes and pondering the intricate details pertaining to living with another person. Flaws in the house began to emerge and what I had thought I had always wanted began to seem a little less appealing (but I still wanted it).

Confusion.

Providence? What happens when you get what you’ve always thought you wanted but at the same time, you get something that you think (maybe) you would want more? How was I to answer this question? Was God allowing this desire of my heart to be fulfilled? or was He showing me that His way is always better and sometimes, we set our hope on things we should not (like that guy I’m not supposed to be crushing on or that job I’m not supposed to take)? Tonell said, “Just give it to God. He’ll show you what to do. I mean, it might take a minute but you’ll know.”

Trust.

“Give me a sign God!”

“Unless I put my hand in His side and feel the wounds myself…”

I wonder if my reasons for wanting the condo are super shallow. It’s not like it’s more cost effective or even furnished! I would be doing so much more work to live there than I would to move into an awesome, FURNISHED apartment that simply showed up on my doorstep. Sometimes, we receive these “out of the blue” blessings but we do not acknowledge them because we’re too busy holding on to our own desire. What if God wants to put you on a different path? What if the messiah shows up and He turns out to be completely different that what you anticipated? “Isn’t that Joseph’s son?” What if He destroys the fabric of your belief system? What if He blows your mind? takes your tiny perspective and expectations and replaces it with TRUTH? I’m talking about more than an apartment now (just F.Y.I.). Think about this idea. What if our vision of God is totally wrong? Can we accept Him when He shows up in all HIS glory not just our idea of Who He is?

Proversb 16:1-3[Amp.]

  THE PLANS of the mind and orderly thinking belong to man, but from the Lord comes the [wise] answer of the tongue.

All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirits (the thoughts and intents of the heart).

  Roll your works upon the Lord [commit and trust them wholly to Him; He will cause your thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and] so shall your plans be established and succeed.

I see His figure on the cross

cast against sunset-sky

I kiss His face,

kiss His feet

and bow to Him

at the foot of the cross.

 

He splatters His blood on me

There is no blood on His body

He shines perfectly

His loins are covered in a white cloth

The blood grows

and I am covered.

 

I look like a monster

trying to rise through ashes of blood

I repulse my mates

I am wrapped in white cloth

and placed in a tomb

ruminating in His death.

 

I rise long after that

to embody His glory

to stand at His side

to reflect His image

His death still brings life even NOW

and I look upon it.

The pursuit of happiness

“As a tree produces fruit, wisdom gives life to those who use it,

and everyone who uses it will be happy.”

-Proverbs 3:18[NCV]

Wisdom:- Insight; Common Sense; Clear Thinking; Practicality.

There are a lot of things that mask themselves as wisdom. A lot of them are birthed in personal desires. What matters is the end result, really. Insight… “I have realized that…”    ”I have noticed that…” It is all around us which is why it is called common sense because we see it everyday. Everyday, we see another batch of people chasing the same thing that have ruined many since the dawn of time. Every generation, someone does it again (whatever it is) that  they thought would work for them this time around even though it has not worked for anyone else (but they are not thinking clearly so they chase the wrong things). What are you chasing?? What has masked itself as the practical thing for you to do? What are you  living for?

Last night, I watched “fame.” A lot of those kids were genuinely talented but the thing that got me later was the speech Kay Panabaker made at the end about how fame is not the measure for success but excitement for life. The people in our lives can add joy to our lives. Wisdom knows that fame is fleeting and money dwindles but people fail us sometimes to.

So what do we have left to hold on to?

“All I go through leads me to You.

I’m not alright.

I’m not alright.

That’s why I need You.”

And you shall know the Truth and the Truth shall set you free.

“Wisdom is more precious than rubies. Nothing you could want is equal to it.” -Proverbs 8:11(ncv)

Man, these treasures on earth, you know. Thieves steal them and moths and rust destroy them. Our treasure should be in heaven.

The pursuit of wisdom is synonnymous with the pursuit of Christ (we can go more in depth about that later).

If you cling to, trust in, and rely on Jesus in all you do, you are clinging to, trusting in, and relying on wisdom.

“Lean on, trust in and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight, and plain your paths. Be not wise in your eyes; reverently fear and worship the Lord and turn [entirely] away from evil. It shall be health to your nerves and sinews, and marrow and moistening to your bones.” -Proverbs 3:5-8[Amp.]

He is the treasure that we are supposed to spend our lives gathering.

Let Him be the center of your hunt not money, sex, fame, houses etc.

“Do not be seized with alarm and struck with fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom! Sell what you possess and give donations to the poor; provide yourselves with purses and handbags thaat do not grow old, an unfailing and inexhaustible treasure in the heavens, where no theif comes near and no moth destroys.”-Luke 12:32-34[Amp.]

Boiled Potatoes

So, I’m watching my cousin again.

I decided to make dinner. Obviously, I’m not going to leave him to starve. So, I spent and hour an a half working on dinner. Peeling, spicing, boiling, coating etc.

I gave him his plate and the conversation proceeded like so:

cousin: Is there pepper in this?

me: yes

cousin: I don’t like pepper

I was extremely disappointed. I responded with disapproval. No “thank you”… nothing; I mean, some people don’t even HAVE food to complain about. The first thing he did was complain and as I took that picture in, I caught a glimpse of God and me.

He prepared a beautiful life and the first thing I did was complain about what I didn’t like. Boo.

I mean, I am so blessed: school, food, shelter, a chance to explore my hobbies and develop my talents, entertainment, recreation, wonderful friends, family, and church… There are so many good things on my plate. It is shameful for me to complain about pepper.

I shouldn’t and neither should you.

P.S. Do you notice a trend in this blog entry and the last??? Haha. I do. I need to get the message.

Growing up

baby growingSo, I would never do this on my own but I’m babysitting my cousin tonight. He wanted to watch this cartoon about a turtle named, “Franklin.” I didn’t  want to watch  it with him but I ended up being sucked in when they started an episode entitled, “Franklin growing up fast.”

I was enraptured  (WEIRD).  The basic point of that episode was that sometimes people get caught up with the idea of growing up (obsessed even) and because they think of it so glowingly, they forget how beautiful what they already have is. They forget that their lives ARE happy and peaceful as is, simply because they get so carried away with how much better they think things will be “when they grow up.”

.

Grown upIt was just like another movie I watched recently on Disney channel starring Debby Ryan called, “16 wishes.” In this movie (SPOILER ALERT), I walked into the life of a teenager who had always  felt she was stuck in an existence that was too small for her. Her main focus pretty much all her life was GROWING UP and getting past all the boring and annoying stuff to the good part – adulthood and all that came with it; having a car, cute clothes, more respect etc. When a supernatural window opened allowing her the opportunity to be granted 16 wishes, she wished (of course) that she would have a car, have the cutest clothes in school, be popular and then (the wish that ruined them all) that she would  be treated like an adult. She got what she wished for except (of course) it wasn’t what she wanted.

She soon realized how good her life was and that she wasn’t ready to grow up. Don’t worry; she got her life back.

I refuse to bash growing up (it’s not like you have a choice) but I do agree with what they’re saying. IN THE MEAN TIME, there’s nothing better than enjoying what you currently have. When the time comes, you’ll enjoy your new adventures but the mistake is in thinking that life as it is right now isn’t good enough. To quote the Hannah Montana song (DON’T YOU DARE JUDGE ME!), ”Life’s what  you make it.”

.

So, I did what any respectable not-adult would do… I drowned some knock-off cocoa puffs in sweet strawberry yogurt and scarfed it down gleefully. Chocolate and strawberry mix surprisingly well. Sometimes, those tiny things really make me happy. I think I’ll go burn a lavender/Orange Blossom/Thyme incense stick and take some deep breaths before retiring for the day. My life is good.

Youth

“Let no one despise or think less of you because of your youth,”

Link: Dr. Seuss

Seuss, Dr., pseud. of Theodor Seuss Geisel, 1904-91, American author and illustrator of children’s books, b. Springfield, Mass. His books are known for their blend of whimsy, zany humor, catchy verse, and outlandish illustrations. His style is evidenced in such books as Horton Hears a Who (1954), The Cat in the Hat (1957),Green Eggs and Ham (1960), and Oh, the Places You’ll Go! (1990). In 1986 he published You’re Only Old Once, about growing old. Although some early critics objected to his carefree style and sometimes violent illustrations, his books are immensely popular.

See biography by J. and N. Morgan, Dr. Seuss & Mr. Geisel (1995).

Let no one despise you. I know what it’s like to feel like you have to play the part of dumb teenager because that is what everybody expects but it is very possible to have good ideas and opinions regardless of how old/young you are. Don’t agree with them because you feel outnumbered. Let no one despise you. Don’t play the part because you’re scared. You don’t have to.

You are a human being with a capacity for knowledge,understanding, and wisdom just like everyone else around you. Don’t let anyone bully you into being less than you are: human. You too, just like they, can look at the world, process your observations and come to a logical conclusion. You have both  the ability to be wrong JUST AS MUCH AS you have the ability to be right (like they do).

“but be an example (pattern) for the believers”

You can be someone that other people look to, to learn from. You can be the trend setter, the one who got it right, the one who found the right method or the key to something. You can be a trail blazer,  a teacher, and a leader in your field. You have the potential to see something people have been missing. You have your own unique tendencies and set of gifts and those could come together to enable you to discover something other people before you did not. So continue to develop yourself as a human. Continue to learn and grow and enjoy your crafts.

“in speech,”

Speak up and let people hear you. You might be wrong and you will learn as you go along but remember: you might also be right even when other people disagree.

“in conduct,”

Be dignified in your actions instead of ashamed. Be someone good. Be patient. Be wise. Be respectable even when you are not respected. By respectable, I don’t mean be prudish; be someone of character and depth. KNOW more and BE more.

“in love,”

We have the power to correct the mistakes of the generation before us. There  have been great pioneers but there have also been great failures. Apathy has ravaged nations and destroyed lives all over battles for money and power. We don’t have to make those same mistakes. When we’re leaving the legacies of our lives,  we can be different. We could be the mother Teresa’s of our times of the Martin Luther King jr.’s of our time. We can be people of character who stand up for what is right and love others instead of stepping on them in our hasty climb to the top.

“in faith,”

I have had professors (who shall remain unnamed) that have tried to force their opinions on the class when it comes to faith and spirituality. With an air of arrogance, they laughed at what others believed because it was not what THEY believed (so naturally everybody else had to be wrong, right? WRONG). I later learned that they are human just like I am and I don’t have to feel intimidated because I don’t believe like they do. Set an example in faith. Don’t let others rob you of your mind by using fear.

“and in purity.”

Duplicity is like a plague that has spread throughout our society uncontrolled. Duplicity says that lying and cheating and deceiving are okay but purity says “I am whole” and “I am who I am not who I pretend to be.” I know I am feeding you ideas that you don’t have to take. Be human enough to form a personal, unbiased opinion about what you have read today,

Buki.

ONe

“Ephesians 4:5, 6, 7″

“[There is] one Lord, one faith, one baptism,”

If there is one Lord, then all other would-be Lords are nullified. If there is one faith, then all other would-be faiths are nullified. If there is one baptism, then all other would-be ceremonies of showing one has found the way to God are nullified. It is like Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life. The only way to the Father is through me.”[John 14:6 -NCV] There aren’t 2 or 3 Lords. I hear a lot of would-be Lords described in this world with all their varied personalities and ways of doing and being. Whoever says they all lead to the same place are unbelievably mistaken. We are not talking about the same God. There is no way to unify the personalities of a God that says “kill under [x] circumstances” and then swings around to say “Don’t kill.” There is no way to unify a God that sacrifices His life for His people and a God that says, “leave the poor be; that is their karma.” These are all different gods with different personalities from the true God and only one way can be right. All these paths lead somewhere different and only one outcome can be the right one.

This verse actually simply speaks on the unity of our faith. We are not confused about who we serve (one Lord);  we are not confused about what we believe (one faith); and we are not confused about how we express that(one baptism). So, anyone that introduces an unbiblical version of who God is is like a cancer in the body of Christ; he or she is attempting to ruin something beautiful. We are secondly not to be led astray into believing the wrong things about what we believe. There is one faith and the understanding of that faith is made available to us through the presence of the Holy Spirit as Jesus said(it’s very simple), “But when the Spirit of truth comes, He will lead you into all truth. He will not speak His own words, but He will speak only what He hears and He will tell you what is to come. The Spirit of truth will bring glory  to me, because He will take what I have to say and  tell it to you. All that the father has is mine. That  is why I said that the Spirit will take what I have to say and tell it to you.” [John 16:13-15 - NCV]. He shows us the way so we need not be confused. If we are listening, we will be patient with others, loving of others and accepting of the way different people in the body commune with God because they have their own relationship with Him. If they’re not taking away from what God has said or adding extra stuff to His words, why fight about it? Calm down and have a good dinner with your family. There is one Lord, one faith, and one baptism.

“One God and Father of [us] all, Who is above all [Sovereign over all], pervading all and [living] in [us] all.”

As Children of God, nothing separates us from one another. We are brother and sister and just think how much we did to earn that: nothing. So, the distance between you and an unbeliever might be huge but it’s also very small. If He does not discriminate, why should we? We are not to feel like we’re better than someone just because of where we are in comparison to where they are in the race. Pride goes before a fall. Remember how easy it was to get saved: to believe in your heart and confess with your mouth and stop feeling like it would be an unimaginable step for other people to take. It IS possible for other people to come under the blanket of God’s love, just  like you did.

“Yet grace (God’s unmerited favor) was given  to each of us individually [not indiscriminately but in different ways] in proportion to the measure Christ’s [rich and bounteous] gift.”

Even though His grace was given to us in different ways, the way in which He apportioned it was the same. As much as Christ was willing to give is as much as you can get and He gave His life. I have had my own personal encounter with God and  have experienced the way  He draped ME in His grace and my story is different from other people’s stories but I have been bestowed just as much grace as the next guy and the same is true for EVERYONE in the world: “”

If He has been so generous with grace, we have no right to shut the door of the Kingdom of God in other people’s faces because it is not our gift to give. HE is the one that gave His life… not us. That would piss me off, honestly, if I bought something expensive for someone I loved and some 3rd party who had nothing to o with the purchasing of the gift went over and told it’s recipient that  it probably wasn’t for them. The nerve! How must Christ feel? Can He stand the injustice of someone being told that the Kingdom of God is not theirs to take when He freely laid it out for all the world? Don’t be that agent of wickedness. Be as generous as your Father and Brother.

Daily Bread

“…And protracted wrangling and wearing discussion and perpetual friction among men who are corrupted in mind and bereft of the truth, who imagine that godliness or righteousness is a [c]source of profit [a moneymaking business, a means of livelihood]. From such withdraw.” – 1 tim 6:5[Amp]

Ok, maybe you’re not actually in a church leadership position you are getting paid for but maybe you still fall into the trap of this kind of wrong thinking. Maybe you treat your relationship with God as a means of livelihood… maybe you think you’re RIGHTEOUSNESS ought to be met with divine financial intervention. This is the kind of thinking that breeds confusion when you have nothing but your daily bread. You think God is punishing you when in reality, that’s not even what He’s really concerned about. He WILL take care of you but sometimes, it’s not in the sense that we expect. Maybe, He’ll give us only what we need… just enough to get by (not more than what we need just so we can have extra to show off).

Give us this day, our daily bread…

Maybe you should stop looking to the heavens saying, “But, I prayed and went to church and fasted. Why haven’t I gotten that promotion? that new car? that new house? those new clothes?” etc… Is you’re allegiance to God dependent on what He gives you. Is He just a source of profit to you? Will you still sit as His feet when you don’t get those extra things you want (but don’t need). What happens when life is normal? When it’s nothing but you waking up and praising Him and learning at His feet for no other reason but the air in your lungs? Don’t stick around just because you’re expecting something extraordinary. He sees your heart. He sees you’re motives.

“[And it is, indeed, a source of immense profit, for] godliness accompanied with contentment (that contentment which is a sense of [d]inward sufficiency) is great and abundant gain.” – Paul, the Apostle (1 Tim 6:6[Amp.])

“11Not that I am implying that I was in any personal want, for I have learned how to be [f] content (satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or disquieted) in whatever state I am.

12I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live in abundance. I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing every situation, whether well-fed or going hungry, having a sufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being in want.

13I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who [g]infuses inner strength into me; I am [h]self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency].” – Paul, the Apostle(Phil 4[Amp.])

Don’t wanna see

MARK 4:12[aMP.]In order that they may [indeed] look and look but not see and perceive, and may hear and hear but not grasp and comprehend, [a]lest haply they should turn again, and it [[b]their willful rejection of the truth] should be forgiven them.(A)

It’s right there in front of them but they’re not going to see it because they don’t WANT to see it. The truth is being spoken to them but they’re not going to hear it because they don’t WANT to hear it. Jesus isn’t purposely trying to conceal anything but the way He presents the parable proves their condition of heart. They look and look but they’ve already formed their own conclusions so they can’t ever actually come to the right conclusion. They’ve concluded that Jesus is the son of God so why would they take His parables about the Kingdom of God as truth about the Kingdom of God?

Beware of forming conclusions too quickly. Beware of imprisoning yourself in ideology. Be open to the fact that you could be wrong and take the truth for what it is. Accept it as it comes, not just as what you want to see it as. And know you can always trust in the goodness, power, and wisdom of God. He will never cause you pain. He’s not that kind of God.

16 My dear brothers and sisters, do not be fooled about this.17 Every good action and every perfect gift is from God. These good gifts come down from the Creator of the sun, moon, and stars, who does not change like their shifting shadows.18 God decided to give us life through the word of truth so we might be the most important of all the things he made.” – James 1[NCV]

11 I say this because I know what I am planning for you,” says the Lord. “I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future.” -Jeremiah 29[NCV]

Don’t be hesitant to accept His truth. He is trustworthy.  You don’t have to be suspicious of Him.

Read the rest of this entry »

mark 8:12

Flosslass

I used to watch Pokemon as a kid everyday.

This morning, my cousin woke up around the same time I did. I found him  in the living room watching TV so I went over and sat next to him. To my surprise, I realized he was watching Pokemon.  In the interest of seeing what it is about this show that captivated me as a kid, I stayed. At the start of the little segment I watched, the 3 main characters were wrapped up in blankets, caught in a blizzard (except Misty wasn’t Misty…. it was some other girl). They lit a fire with one of Ash’s fire pokemon but then a wad of snow fell on it. In the distance, they noticed a pokemon they soon identified as Flosslass. Flosslass was a snow pokemon that could freeze it’s opponent to temparatures as low as -60.

Flosslass  led  our heros and heroine to a warm cabin, fed them warm soup(let me just say; I found it a little wierd that a pokemon had a house all to itself and fed them soup like a  human) and drew a hot bath that one our heroine’s pokemon jumped in.  Instantly, her pokemon was trapped in what seemed to be an ice straight-jacket; they realized the “warm cabin” was really a frozen cave; and their warm soup was really shaven ice. Meowth (a talking Pokemon their belonged to their nemesis(ees?)) showed up in that same ice straight-jacket to translate. Apparently, Meowth and his owners had been caught in that same trap (blizzard, warm cabin…). Flosslass captured them because one of it’s friends was lost in the woods and it needed help finding it’s friend. Our heroine’s pokemon was bait – find my friend and you get your pokemon back.

INTERESTING… So, it started out with them caught in a really bad circumstance. Even some of their efforts at making the situation better failed. ALL  OF A SUDDEN, in comes what seems to be their salvation. They rush to it, enjoy a split second of bliss and then all of  a sudden, they’re trapped doing someone’s dirty work.  That’s about as far as a watched but I got the opportunity to see a great parallel in it. Our main characters just didn’t know where it would all lead up to. They thought they had found the solution to their problems. That’s what sin is like… a mask; and if we are uneducated about it then, like the characters in pokemon, we’ll find ourselves having to buy something we didn’t bargain for. It’s reminiscent of this scripture:

“People who want to be rich fall into all sorts of temptations and traps. They are caught by foolish and harmful desires that drag them down and destroy them. The love of money causes all kinds of trouble. Some people want money so much that they have given up their faith and caused themselves a lot of pain” – 1 Tim. 6:9-10[NCV]

The Amplified version puts it like this:

“But those who crave to be rich fall into temptation and a snare and into many foolish (useless, godless) and hurtful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction and miserable perishing. For the love of money is a root of all evils; it is through this craving that some have been led astray and have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves through with many [a]acute [mental] pangs.”1 Tim. 6;9-10[Amp.]

But in all your endevours, do remember that God never entices you to sin and become educated about sin and its dangers (in the here and now as well as the life to come). He is the way out, not the cause.

13Let no one say when he is tempted, I am tempted from God; for God is incapable of being tempted by [what is] evil and He Himself tempts no one.

14But every person is tempted when he is drawn away, enticed and baited by his own evil desire (lust, passions).

15Then the evil desire, when it has conceived, gives birth to sin, and sin, when it is fully matured, brings forth death.’ – James 1[Amp.]

“Even if you think you can stand up to temptation, be careful not to fall. You are tempted in the same way that everyone else is tempted. But God can be trusted not to let you be tempted too much, and he will show you how to escape from your temptations.” – 1 Corinthians 10;12-13[CEV]

So…

Mark 6:12

“So the followers went out and preached that people should change their hearts and lives.”

This was a very intense game of  “Simon says.” Jesus’ followers weren’t preaching things they hadn’t already experienced or done. They went where Jesus called and did what He told them to do even when it sounded a bit unnatural. They had grown to know enough about His power to know it was divine and worthy of the utmost reverence. If they were still battling skepticism about this Jesus Character, they certainly didn’t seem to show it.

Take no bread? no bag? no money?

“…the followers went out”

take only the clothes you are wearing? wear sandals?

“…the followers went out”

Rely on the hospitability of people in that town?

“… the followers went out”

What is the slightly odd thing Jesus has asked YOU to do? Perhaps forgive; love; be patient; hold your tongue; give something away; drop something in your life; talk to someone; DON’T talk to someone etc

Maybe you should trust in His counsel and wisdom and see where it takes you.

Look at the amazing things that happened when “…the followers went out.”

It’s so elementary and so divine. It might not even be about you as much as it is about the people that need to be healed.

“They forced many demons out and put olive oil on many sick people and healed them”

-Mark 6:13(NCV)

Fighting dirty

Proverbs 13:2(Amp.)

A good man eats good from the fruit of his mouth, but the desire of the treacherous is for violence.

I know just how easy it is to fall into thinking that you have to fight dirty to stay on top. Maybe you’ve been unfairly treated and you think you have to retaliate violently in order to be heard but common sense would beg to differ.

If you truly want peace and freedom, know that you won’t find it in dirty places so don’t waste your time fighting dirty.

Have you ever met someone that is truly at peace? They don’t waste their time trying to prove they’re tough. They enjoy life when other people waste time being treacherous. Don’t become the person that has hurt you.

I like the way Eugene Peteson said it,

“The good acquire a taste for helpful conversation;
bullies push and shove their way through life.”
(the msg)

Open eyes

This morning, I didn’t take my bible with me when I left the house. I didn’t forget. my conclusion was that it would  be better for me to leave it at home then actually devote special time for bible study in front of a computer than for me to take it and forget it in my bag all day.

By 10 am, after my first class, the weight of all the things I have due this week began to settle on my heart and drain the very life out of my body. Coupled with that, I was running on barely any sleep.

I was at that point of such an intense stress that I didn’t even know what foot to put in front of the other.

His solution to everything is to have me sit and learn at His feet then go and do what He has taught me to do.

This morning, He gave me an admonition: ‘speak the truth.”

So, when the opportunity came for me to  do so, I did. I had an extremely  honest conversation with one of my classmates. It was someone I’m cool with but not like super-buddies, you know?

Anyway, through this conversation, I got to air some of my qualms and so did that person. We talked for like 50 minutes on the phone which was unusual but here’s what I learned:

When you’re not having honest conversations with others, you don’t see how your actions (or lack of action) affects them. I saw the impact of my actions tonight… or maybe I just finally opened my eyes to what I had already suspected but never admitted.

I realized that I have intense potential but because I’m not willing to put in extra time and effort or sacrifice my comfort, I’m not living up to that potential and that saddens me. That’s something my sister and parents have been saying to me since Kingdom come but my heart is open now… or maybe it’s my eyes that are open.

I thank God for His mercy. I really do. If His Holy Spirit hadn’t taught me to seek truth, I never would have found it and I wouldn’t know the things I do now… More than a sad realization, I want this morning to propel me to excellence. I want to be a better person. I really do.

Save me Father

and teach me how.

Buki

April 29, 2010 [Friday - 2:51am]

3 things – 3 teachers

Today I learned 3 things

3 things from 3 teachers:

The Holy Spirit

Life

Myself

Sitting beneath raging trees and glimmering sun,

Sometimes we have to stop the noise and let God speak. That’s what Sabbath is about  -

The only time trees move is when the wind blows

Walking for no reason other than to walk in the cool of the day

It is easier to walk when you take nothing but the bare essentials. Extra weight slows you down and stops you from walking freely, running, dancing…

Strolling alone at night

It is easier to defend yourself quickly if your weapon is already up in the air not resting on the ground; your weapon must be strong enough to last through the heart of battle.

Tonight, I experienced someone having a complaining attitude about helping me with something.

First of all, this person belittled me.

Second of all, said person didn’t even turn out to be that big of a help ‘cuz I don’t think (s)he even knew what (s)he was doing.

I felt angry.

Then I felt conviction.

The Holy Spirit has that way of telling me to be quiet when I want to lift up my voice to tear people down.

He allows my own sin to creep up on me so that I can see how I am no better than whoever I am angry at.

He said, “Romans 4:5″ and “Romans 5:4″ but it was like He was speaking both verses simultaneously. The first to encourage me that He had the ability to change people’s hearts and also to remind me that at the end of the day, He is the one who decides what the definition of righteousness is (therefore I had to right to judge).  The second was to remind me to be patient.

At the end of the night, I realized something. After this person had given me attitude about something so simple, I was just like, “Man, I don’t need you  out here with me. I can do this by myself. I mean,  I didn’t call you out here because I needed you (necessarily). I called you out here because I trusted that you could do this simple task for me and do it well but if you don’t want to, I can do it myself.”

And instantly, it hit me.  Isn’t that how we are with God? He calls us to do something and we act as if He needs us. We treat Him with contempt (as if He’s weak) but at the end of the day, we don’t even know what we’re doing ANYWAY. I mean, He can do this stuff Himself. Are you coming along for the ride or not? Don’t think so highly of yourself. God is fully capable of handling His business whether you get involved or not.

For me, having someone with an attitude is SO not worth the time and energy I could have saved just doing it myself. Nagging, complaining spirits just bring you down and I strive to avoid such company.

“It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop [on the flat oriental roof, exposed to all kinds of weather] than in a house shared with a nagging, quarrelsome, and faultfinding woman.” -Proverbs 21:9(Amp.)

My friends, if you see that in me. Reprimand me.

The saved church

I just listened to an amazing message. It was called, “The Love Revolution: Part 2.”

In this message, both Joyce Meyer and Chris Caine spoke. I praise God for what I heard them say because WOW. He is marvelous.

As Christians, we cannot afford to continue to cater to our flesh and be carnal without expecting a huge bill at the end of the day. We also can’t DO witnessing; we must BE witnesses. What a misconception it is when you think you can have a nasty spirit, put a gospel track in someone’s hand and expect them to want to be like you.

“I have come into the world, to bear witness to the Truth.” -Jesus (John 18:37 – Amp.)

Jesus didn’t just come to spew words out about his life, death, and resurrection that could not be clearly seen. His LIFE bore testimony to the truth and that was in addition to His bold speaking.

“The Word became flesh and blood,
and moved into the neighborhood.”

- John 1:14 Msg

We have to let God move into the neighborhood. Stop being afraid to let Him reside with you 24-7 and don’t settle for weekly visits on Sundays. What we’ve done is we’ve made church like an Intensive Care Unit where we come in and cry, “Pastor, Pastor, Heal me! I need to be saved again this week.” So the bulk of the time, the church spends time just trying to keep Christians saved. But if only  we’d get in the word and let God clear our hearts, we could actually get on with the job of reaching a saved and broken world with the powerful message of Jesus.

“…let us strip off and throw aside every encumbrance (unnecessary weight) and that sin which so readily (deftly and cleverly) clings to and entangles us, and let us run with patient endurance and steady and active persistence the appointed course of the race that is set before us,  Looking away [from all that will distract] to Jesus, Who is the Leader and the Source of our faith”

-Hebrews 12:1-12 (Amp.)

Even our faults can be distractions. Let us fix our focus on God, get in the world and get on with the job.

Waste of space

You are not a waste of space.

You are not a waste of grace.

* 1 Corinthians 15:1-11 *

You are not a failure.


Mark 3 (NIV)

8When they heard all he was doing, many people came to him from Judea, Jerusalem, Idumea, and the regions across the Jordan and around Tyre and Sidon. 9Because of the crowd he told his disciples to have a small boat ready for him, to keep the people from crowding him. 10For he had healed many, so that those with diseases were pushing forward to touch him. 11Whenever the evil[a] spirits saw him, they fell down before him and cried out, “You are the Son of God.”

Christ has healed many. Why not me? Why not you?

He Lords over any sort fo demonization. Press through and touch Him. Reach for His grace.

He is the Son of God.

You are not unworthy to be redeemed.

No one is unworthy to receive the free gift of redemption extended to you.

You are the only one stopping yourself from claiming it.

These people did not waste time thinking, “I’m not worthy.”

No! They went, “Mary Jo down the street got her healing. I need healing and Jesus is dishing it out so I’m running to Him.”

Whatever your past, God’s agenda is to make everything new.

Will you be a part of that today?

Awkward Silence

We are alive not because we’re riding a big static high but because we go though highs and lows.

Or heart pumps blood through our system: contract-relax-contract-relax-contract-relax…

If it were in a constant state of contraction, nothing would be flowing. If it were in a constant state

of relaxation, nothing would be flowing. The highs and lows have to be mixed in with each other.

So, we feel bad because we’re not on a spiritual high all the time but one of the things that set me free from a

heavy weight of guilt was realizing that being high all the time was just as bad as being low all the time:

It becomes static. THERE MUST BE DOWN TIME IN ORDER FOR MOTION TO OCCUR OR ELSE, WHAT

YOU HAVE IS STATIC… COMPLACENT (no matter what it is).

.

Think about  sine wave’s amplitude pattern.

think about a person walking.

Think about your breathing pattern.

Think about how you rise at the beginning of your day but then fall asleep again.

The list goes on and on.

.

One day, I got through with my office hours at 1pm and knew my sister would be in her building working

till 1:30pm. I called her and asked if I could come over. She said  “yes” and so I did. There was a girl standing

in front of the desk whom I briefly introduced myself to. I took my seat next to my sister and we said nothing to

each other. She had her headphones on while I sat in the chair next to her. I don’t even remember what I was doing.

The girl looked at us and asked, “Are y’all sisters?” And we both affirmed it. She said, “I could tell ‘cuz y’all didn’t

say anything to each other.”

.

And isn’t that how it is with someone you know and love? Silence is not awkward. When there is nothing to say,

there is no fear… no need to pad the silence with useless words because you  know each other more than that.

And so it is with the Lord. He will speak when there is something to say but other than that, expect the steady

comfort of silence for He is STILL your God and He is STILL your Father and He is STILL your friend. It doesn’t

mean He doesn’t love you… Contrary to that, it actually means you are intimately acquainted enough with Him

for Him to not have to feel like He has to reassure you that He’s  still in the room. Padding silence is done to soothe

the insecurity of an unsure child who thinks her Father has left her alone in the darkness.

Like Job, know that your redeemer lives even when there is nothing but silence.

.

He will speak again.

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So, I’m from Nigeria which is practically right next to Ghana. I was glad to sing at something that had this goal  in mind, not just  bacause its Ghana but because it’s what we’re supposed to do… love, love, love and I need help with that. I need to be better. I want to do more.

Is such a fast as yours what I have chosen, a day for a man to humble himself with sorrow in his soul? [Is true fasting merely mechanical?] Is it only to bow down his head like a bulrush and to spread sackcloth and ashes under him [to indicate a condition of heart that he does not have]? Will you call this a fast and an acceptable day to the Lord?

[Rather] is not this the fast that I have chosen: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the bands of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every [enslaving] yoke?(B)

Is it not to divide your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house–when you see the naked, that you cover him, and that you hide not yourself from [the needs of] your own flesh and blood?

The above quotation was taken from Isaiah 58:5-7 in the Amplified version of the bible.

So, the story (I like to document my life so here goes):

March 2, Pat Ward (Pastor at The Orchard -  super cool church) sent me a message on facebook and told me about a concert that was going to take place on the 26th. A member of their church, Katie Heckel was planning to go to Africa for a mission trip this summer and the concert was to raise funds. He invited me to sing at the concert.

Here’s the super coll thing, though  – I’d met him in the fall of 2008 (Oct-Dec???) when my friend Stormie invited me to church with her. At that time, the Orchard was still meeting at the Orchard and I had been doing shows too (like at big truck and a play… so I was still singing at the time). When I  met him, he had apparently heard about me  around town from different people which I found weird and cool at the same time. It was like, “Whoa, people actually like the music?” and “Whoa, they actually talk about it.” That first time I met him, he gave me an open invitation to sing at the Orchard.  I was psyched.

So, fast forward a year and a half or so, I just randomly remembered that day I met him and he gave me that open invitation. I wondered why I had never acted on that/why nothing had come together. That was the week he sent the facebook message.

Here’s another complication to the story. I had given up playing guitar and singing in shows… at least not as much because my parents seized my guitar mid-2008 or so, I think if not earlier. It took me a while to quit. I just would not. The reason they took it away was because it was distracting me from school but I just got a guitar from a  friend that didn’t play. He let me hold on to it for like, a year so I was still kinda doing my thing… finally, I just felt wrong completely about music. Not having the support of my parents really damaged it for me so I buried it. I stopped writing and I got sick of music. It literally sickened me after a while and even made me angry… angry because I loved it but didn’t feel like I should. It was anoverwhelming period where passion and confusion clashed.

If you’ve seen me sing in the past year and a half, excluding the past  2 weeks, I was battling that love-hate thing within myself. I was PLAGUED with fear and self-doubt. There’s something about not being supported

Oh, but God is my Father. God is my mother.

Approximately two weeks ago (March 18, 2010) I went to winterjam.

I watched.

These people on stage (not all of them, but a select few) REALLY propelled me toward God, like, REALLY. The words they sang were powerful and that’s something some people can pull off without being legit but somethings cannot be faked… at least, that’s what I felt. So that night, I realized that they used the music God had given them to perpetuate the aroma of Jesus Christ.

I journaled about that night. God planned it. This whole thing had been God in the making long before that night. That whole  day was just so huge that it kinda smacked me in the face and I couldn’t ignore it.

WHY ARE YOU BURYING YOUR TALENT?

WHY? STOP! STOP THAT RIGHT NOW.

[To Be Continued]

ACTS 10:34-35(ncv) Peter began to speak: “I really understand now that to God every person is the same. In every country God accepts anyone who worships him and does what is right.

Beautiful transformation of heart there. To grow up with the notion that certain types of people, certain tribes, certain people groups are just bad eggs… and then to have that heart change where you can look at them

and no longer see stereotypes

no longer see skin

no longer see sex

.

but see people loved of God,

to see children created by God,

people that Jesus came and died for.


whoa! That’s a big deal and I praise God for His power & graciousness in changing hearts.

“Jesus is Lord of all people!” – Acts 10:36(NCV)

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34 فَبَدَأَ بُطْرُسُ كَلاَمَهُ قَائِلاً: «تَبَيَّنَ لِي فِعْلاً أَنَّ اللهَ لاَ يُفَضِّلُ أَحَداً عَلَى أَحَدٍ،

35 بَلْ يَقْبَلُ مَنْ يَتَّقِيهِ وَيَعْمَلُ الصَّلاَحَ مَهْمَا كَانَتْ جِنْسِيَّتُهُ.

(Arabic Life Application Bible)

.

34Petrus aber tat seinen Mund auf und sprach: Nun erfahr ich mit der Wahrheit, daß Gott die Person nicht ansieht;

35sondern in allerlei Volk, wer ihn fürchtet und recht tut, der ist ihm angenehm.

(Luther Bibel 1545)

.

34 Entonces Pedro comenzó a decirles:

–Ahora comprendo que para Dios todos somos iguales.35 Dios ama a todos los que le obedecen, y también a los que tratan bien a los demás y se dedican a hacer lo bueno, sin importar de qué país sean.

(Biblia en Lenguaje Sencillo)

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34Alors Pierre, ouvrant la bouche, dit: En vérité, je reconnais que Dieu ne fait point acception de personnes,

35mais qu’en toute nation celui qui le craint et qui pratique la justice lui est agréable.

(Louis Segond)

There is more to your soul than religion. Life is not about finding a cool little club you can join. God made us and put us here and He is the goal that we seek. We were made to be like Him. He made us to be like Him but in our sin we fell short of that and what was meant to be a beautiful image of God became wrecked with hatred, fear, death, envy, duplicity and darkness. Lord, give me the words to speak. But until we turn back to Him, until we acknowledge Him as God we are a lost people. We are lost and we are condemned. Not just you; not just me; ALL of us. But God is also a kind, merciful, loving God. He will stand to judge us someday but we will not pass the test. We have lied, we have stolen, we have blasphemed, we have committed adultery, we have borne false witness, we have dishonored our parents, we have made idols of created things, we have hated our brethren which is murder, we have worked for money but we have not stopped to worship God, we have coveted what belongs to others. When we stand before God, we will have no excuse. The only saving Grace we have now is Christ. He came. He lived as a man. He walked this earth. He was the only blameless man and He was the son of God. When He died on the cross. He did it for all of us. He took the weight and punishment of our sin upon Himself. The sins we have committed are sins against God HIMSELF not just against people and for it, for our evil vile hears, we deserve nothing less than hell. But by turning away from those sins, to Jesus, believing in our hearts that He is Lord and confessing it with our mouths, we will be saved from the punishment we so fully deserve. He is good and He deserves our full devotion. That is why today, I ask you as a friend, will you accept the perfect sacrifice that Jesus made for you or will you reject His hand while it is extended? Do it now because on the day of judgment, it will be too late.

“For the Word that God speaks is alive and full of power [making it active, operative, energizing, and effective]; it is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating to the dividing line of the [g]breath of life (soul) and [the immortal] spirit, and of joints and marrow [of the deepest parts of our nature], exposing and sifting and analyzing and judging the very thoughts and purposes of the heart.”

“Nothing in all the world can be hidden from God. Everything is clear and lies open before him, and to him we must explain the way we have lived.”

-Hebrews 4:12(Amp) & 13 (NCV)

Winterjam 2010

So, yesterday,

my darling friend Elizabeth Page, her boyfriend Brad, and her mom, Marti drove down from Meridian.

They picked me up from Oxford and we headed out to Tupelo for Winterjam. The doors weren’t scheduled to open  till 6pm but Brad wanted to be in line at 2pm. Anyhoo, I ate at a place called Danvers (really awesome fries… just saying)

I met Brad’s aunt Kim. This was also the first time I was getting to hang out with ms. Marti (Elizabeth’s mom). She was so beautiful as a person. I’m glad I got to hang out with her yesterday.

So, We get to the Bancorp South Center and we’re sitting outside in the blistering sun. These two guys walk over and start talking to us because they’re bored. Haha. It was awkward at first. Anyhoo, we got around to talking about music. Next thing you know, I find out Elizabeth’s guitar is in her car and we’re off. We grabbed it and had a jam-worship session out there.

The 2 guys eventually left (I  hope they didn’t feel ignored). 2 girls came up to us  and said, “Hi, my friend wants to know if she can come over and play for you guys. She has a great gift of music and song writing”. Those girls were super legit friends. I mean, they were singing all the words to her song and I was like, “Wow. They really love and appreciate their friend.”

The girl with the talent was Layna. They all came over and GUESS WHAT! They were Phil Wickham fans so we got to worship by singing “Canons.” Just being out there with those people I had never met before, I said, “This is what Heaven is going to be like.” There’s no experience like meeting sisters you did not grow up with.

We sang “Lead me to the cross” and “Marvelous light” and on and on it went. It was marvelous. Haha. God is so so good. Layna also sang a song she wrote. My jaw dropped. I loved it. Elizabeth, Brad, and I gave her our email addresses. She sent us some songs she had recorded and added us on facebook. I saw the e-mails about an hour ago and accepted her on facebook a little bit after. Praise God. I pray the best for her as she pursues music.

We got in line, we waited, we sweated. Elizabeth and I worshiped to some amazing songs on her ipod. I’ll tell you, she is just the person when it comes to music. If you ever go to a concert, go with Elizabeth Page. She was jumping, wooping, dancing… at one point when Third day was performing, she even whipped out some sign language. I was like, “Whoa.” Haha. I praise God for her. She is an amazing friend.

So, we got in and these guys called “revive” opened up. Elizabeth knew who they were. In her words, ” ‘Chorus of the saints’ is my song! ” They had beautiful Australian accents and they opened up with the overhead clap. I just love doing the overhead clap. I need to bust that out at church one of these Wednesdays… Haha. I LOVED them. I was like, “Why don’t I know these people?!!!” Well, cuz I don’t listen to K-love or have the gospel music channel… so, yea. I also liked Dave’s pants. Ok, side note, EVERYONE was in skinny jeans (if they’re made of leather, do you still call them skinny jeans or say “skinny leather pants”? Just doesn’t roll off the tongue as quickly. Anyhoo, I wondered if that was just a rock star thing. The crew was sporting the skinny jeans thing too… I want some. Seriously. I’ve been thinking about it for a while. Sorry… long segway. These are the things that distract me, see?)

Right now, I’m listening to “Sit with me” by Revive. Wow. Praise God. PLEASE, MAY I TOUR WITH THEM, GOD? haha. No, seriously. I’ll sing back up…

It was an awesome lineup. After the show, I got to meet Revive and they were super nice. That night, I was encouraged. Fireflight taught me not to fear. Third day taught me to ask God for direction. Robert Pierre taught me that being young had nothing to do with it. I got to take a pic with Fireflight… woot! and Robert Pierre (French?) and Revive.

All in all, an amazing night. To God be the glory.

Pride & Prejudice

Sometimes it is possible to assume that someone is not
fond of you because of their rank or race. Perhaps as
a rich person, you think poor people are spitefully
jealous of you.

Perhaps as a poor person, you think that rich people
are arrogantly disturbed by your presence. Perhaps it
is true.

Perhaps as a White person, you think that black people
are not fond of you. Perhaps as a black person, you
think white people are not fond of you. Perhaps it is
true.

Maybe walking down the street, you are simply two
people who assume the other is not fond of you.
(S)he really could have feelings of pride and prejudice
towards you but (s)he could just be someone who is
desperately trying to reach out to you. Put a smile on
for the latter. If you find that you are rejected,
press on. But if not, enjoy your new found friendship.

Matthew 4:12 plus some more

Matthew 4:12

That was so sad to read. It’s like the story of Job. Now, His dear cousin’s in jail?!

Back to back.

I mean, He was just facing temptation left and right & grew weary enough that God sent angels to minister to Him.

Honestly, I’m grateful He got that break to get rejuvenated before the next big thing would come around. Have you ever relaxed your walk to a glacial pace when you felt like the devil had left you alone?

Well, the truth of the matter is you need ministering to. That’s your chance to refuel so you can be ready when he comes back.

Paul admonished Timothy in 2 Tim. 4:2 to “Keep your sense of urgency [stand by, be at hand and ready], whether the opportunity seems to be favorable or unfavorable.” (Amp.) when it came to preaching the word.

Peter in His letter to “to the elect exiles of the dispersion scattered (sowed) abroad in Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia, and Bithynia” warned them as Christians to, “Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy… the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour.“(see 1 Peter 5:8 – Amp.)

And I believe we too, as Christians today, should take our cue from examples like the ones listed above. We should always be watchful. We should always be singing, praising, watching out for bitterness and conceit (which makes one critical), LEARNING AT GOD’S FEET, allowing others to correct and teach us

so we can grow into full maturity.

Put pride aside and make it your aim in life to grow spiritually no matter what/how.

4:17 –> I think it’s amazing how as soon as it was time for Jesus to take over, John the baptizer, all of a sudden, could not do what he used to do. All of a sudden He was imprisoned and we find out, later killed.

Jesus’ time had begun.

It was as if John had done what he came to do.  He had prepared the way for Jesus. Now instead of John(Mt. 3:1-2), Jesus was the one crying out, “Repent.”

John had said that Jesus who was mightier would come… that though John baptized with water, Jesus would baptized with the Holy Spirit and with fire(Mt. 3:11). In one account, John the baptizer said that unless heaven allowed it, he could receive nothing so he was content to do as much as God permitted(John 3:27-Amp.) and because of that, he could confidently say,

[Jesus] must increase, but I must decrease. [He must grow more prominent; I must grow less so.]” (as told by John, the disciple & Apostle in John 3:30- Amp.)

Even in the previous verse, John the baptizer easily admitted that he was just Christ’s forerunner and he was okayw ith that,

Humbly accept the call of God on your life without stirring up strife or wasting time in jealousy.

We are all called to different things.

With a heart of humility and contentment, accept your lot in life (in the area of God’s plan for you) or else everything will always be a battle for you.

Part of living a truly peaceful life simply involves accepting whatever God gives you because He gives with a definite purpose in mind. Who else will give you anything even remotely worthwhile?

So John had to drop out of the scene because that’s the way the story was written… because he obeyed God (which is actually the reason he was arrested).

And all of a sudden, Jesus finishes his forty-day fast and He’s out there ministering.

Please don’t think He didn’t care about John’s lot. Jesus is full of compassion.

vs. 18-19 –> Nice metaphorical language there, Jesus (fishers of men).

letting Me be your guide

Rest assured and fight forgetfulness. Part of the call of Jesus to His disciples (which includes YOU) involves you willingly allowing yourself to be guided by Him. This involves obedience, humility, submission.

You must beat your being into submission to Christ. Subservience to Him must be a conscious choice you make when you say “yes” to Jesus

for life.

N.B. –> “Letting” is present continous.

Keep allowing Jesus guide you on each individual day by starting it at His feet. If you fail to do so on any day, you have seized to let Him be your guide.

If you think about fishing for men (not guys but humans in general), you don’t just kinda sit somewhere on the shore and wait for fish to come to you.

You gotta be out there in the middle of life, going after people and if you fail, you fail

but when you reel in a really big catch, it’s totally worth it.

Every catch is a worth it. Just get out there. There is an amount of waiting for the fish to come to you but you still gotta be out there where the action is.

Do not live a lackadaisical, “it’ll all work out” life.

Discipline yourself & be ready… always ready to preach like God said.

vs. 20 At once! they obeyed even leaving their nets. I know you’re in the middle of something right now & it doesn’t seem very cost effective to leave whatever awesome project you’re working on halfway

but leave it anyway

because the call Jesus gives you is more significant that anything else you’ll ever do

IN YOUR LIFE.

Simplicity & Intricacy

A GOOD name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favor rather than silver and gold.

The rich and poor meet together; the Lord is the Maker of them all.

A prudent man sees the evil and hides himself, but the simple pass on and are punished [with suffering].

The reward of humility and the reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.

Thorns and snares are in the way of the obstinate and willful; he who guards himself will be far from them.”

Pause. Look around.

You will notice that the things you see are very simple.

But upon closer examination, you will notice that they are very intricately designed.

My leg is merely a leg that moves until you see beneath my skin and into my flesh, to the cells and the DNA that lies within. Then you leap for joy and praise the God who made me…  the God who made you.

Pause.  Look a little deeper.

Simplicity is the garment that intricacy wears so that you must… PAUSE… come closer, take a few steps forward, to get to know her.

“All has been heard; the end of the matter is: Fear God [revere and worship Him, knowing that He is] and keep His commandments, for this is the whole of man [the full, original purpose of his creation, the object of God's providence, the root of character, the foundation of all happiness, the adjustment to all inharmonious circumstances and conditions under the sun] and the whole [duty] for every man.”

Amen.

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War

genesis 4:1-16

………………………………………..A……………………………………….

Amraphel king of Shinar ……..G.……Bera king of Sodom

Arioch king of Ellasar…………A…….Birsha king of Gomorrah

Kedorlaomer king of Elam….I…… Shinab king of Admah

Tidal king of Goiim…………….N……. Shemeber king of Zeboiim

………………………………………..S…….Zoar King of Bela

…………………………………………..T……………………………………….

4 kings               vs.         5 kings

the 5 kings  were subject to Kedorlaomer, king of Elam for 12 years.

In year 13, rebel

hence, war.


We go down to the valley of Siddim

There are tar pits where the 5 kings have drawn their battle lines. Then, the 4 Kings defeat the 5 who rebelled.


Lot  falls within the cross fire since he’s in Sodom & gets captured by the 4 Kings.


One guy escapes the 4 kings & tells Abram what had happened.


Abram takes 318 men born in his household.

At night, Abram and his men attack the 4 kings & their army and the bible says he “routed” them (NIV, Amp.) which  dictionary.reference.com defines as any

“overwhelming defeat”

[see definition, "rout"]

These 318 guys go in, go out; clean break

They just went to rescue their kindred, you  know?

So I walk away scratching my head.


What happened?


And then it dawns on me:

The 5 kings drew their battle lines in the day-time.

“oh we’re going to war & we’re going to massacre these great powers.”

It was such a pride thing.

“and not only that, we’re going to do it in a valley full of tar pits.”


What were they thinking? the other guys would fall into the pits & somehow they would walk away  unscathed?
I think  they were so motivated & blinded by pride that they didn’t have a legitimate mission except to glorify themselves.

They were not content to gain their victory in the dead of night.

All we need are the bare essentials that will achieve the goal in mind.

It doesn’t have to be tricky or complicated.

We need to be humble enough to pursue things with purpose in mind

not vain glory.

PHILIPPIANS 2:3(Amp.) Do nothing from factional motives [through contentiousness, strife, selfishness, or for unworthy ends] or prompted by conceit and empty arrogance. Instead, in the true spirit of humility (lowliness of mind) let each regard the others as better than and superior to himself [thinking more highly of one another than you do of yourselves].

Don’t waste your time and energy going for the things the world ooo’s and ah’s over

If you’re going to get something, get it because you have an actual purpose of use in mind for it, you know?

And by so doing, you will live the life you love and love the life you live rather than striving toward useless ends.

And more important than that,

you will actually have room in your heart & mind to focus on what’s truly important… rather who:

God.

GALATIANS 1:10(Amp.)Now am I trying to win the favor of men, or of God? Do I seek to please men? If I were still seeking popularity with men, I should not be a bond servant of Christ (the Messiah).

??

Luke 14:27 And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple.

What is my cross?

AM I bearing it?

Drown

I desire so much to drown in You

I need to get lost inside of You

Eat me up

Swallow me whole

So I can finally breathe

I am dead

I’m suffocating here

The biggest part of me has been sliced off

And I don’t know how to handle it

I can’t stay calm anymore

I beg You, take me with You

Don’t leave me here any longer

How I long to feel You

and touch You

O God O God O God O God O God

I have this hunger

There’s this strange thirst

There is a foreign desire

I am finally waking up to for the first time:

You

How have I lived so long apart from You?

Please make this end

How pathetic and pitiful… if this were it

Rescue me from turbulent waters

I beg You, let me drown in You

My 23rd Psalm

God is all I need in life.

He gives the peace I have tried to find in wealth and beauty.

He brings the joy I have tried to find in popularity.

He is all the calm I thought that achievement could bring.

When I am weak He is strong and because He is in me, I never have to be weak, come what may.

I never thought I could be righteous. I thought, “surely no one can redeem me from this pit, not even God. Can He?”

But He showed up and showed out. His word did not fall to the ground. Every good thing said about His wondrous power came to pass in me.

No one will see and laugh at me. No one will mock those who call on Jesus saying, “Your God has forsaken you.”

He has not forsaken me. He will not forsake me.

Even in those times of deep distress,

when I don’t know what foot to put in front of the other,

when I don’t know what path is the right one to take,

when I don’t know what is safe,

I can hold on to His hand and know that as I walk with Him, He will clear the road before me.

I can trust Him.

I can trust Him to fight off every evil that tries to engulf me.

I can trust Him to lead me down the right path.

I have many enemies that try to afflict me.

They attack my mind daily. They go for my soul. They go for my Spirit

but they must sit and watch the Lord love me.

They must stare in agony as He shows me favor and as He defeats their attacks.

The cut my flesh with knives. They aim to kill me. They have cut scars into my skin

but He pours the oil on my wounds. He increases my anointing. He sees my affliction.

He looks upon my bruises and pours wine in abundance to clean me. Though my enemies

desired to see me wounded,

it is the oil that remains,

and it is the wine that remains,

but the scar is gone.

The Lord has done this that I may be free and that I may look upon the afflicted and extend a fresh hand,

a hand of hope, healed of the same bruises they have been afflicted with.

They had evil in mind and they carried out their scheme but the Lord had good in mind and He carried out his scheme.

They hated me but the Lord loved me.

Every attack they formed against me was negated by the mighty power of God.

He has loved me in the past and He shall love me the rest of my life.

He has been good to me in the past and He will not stop now.

I am in covenant with Him.

He is unrelenting.

His love is strong.

It is strong enough to break every yoke and to carry out the good deeds He has in His heart toward me.

I belong to the Lord.

I am His temple.

I am destined to worship in the house of God all my life

and when this body is swallowed up in life,

I shall live all eternity in His household.

Never death.

Never sorrow.

Always life.

Always faith, hope, and love.

Selah.

deroutée

Je suis là à nouveau. J’ai trop des choix: revenir au Nigéria ou rester ici et trouver d’emploi.

Dans l’automne J’etais sûr que sois avec ma famille est le plus important choix mais plus récemment, je me sens frustré et fatigué avec l’école et je veux trouve d’emploi. Ma famille veut que je ne quitte pas l’école (peut-être je quitterai l’informatique seulment) mais je crois qu’ils ne comprennent pas.

Peut-être je suis trop jeune…

“Que personne ne méprise ta jeunesse, mais sois un modèle pour les croyants par tes paroles, ta conduite, ton amour, [ton esprit,] ta foi, ta pureté.” – 1 Timothée 4:12(SG21)

(Lorsque j’ai finit High School, ma meilleure amie m’a donné ce passage pour m’encourager)
C’est dûr. Je veux rester à la droit  mais c’est difficille avec toutes les genres de messages que j’entends chaque jour.

Aides-moi chèr Père. C’est quoi ton plan? Je veux savoir quoi à faire maintenant… s’il te plais. Tu est mon salut et mon rocher. Sois mon appui, please. Merci pour ton amour et ton esprit :) merci pour la paix aussi. Je me sens calme. On saura éventuellement.

Virgin Birth/Christianity

Yesterday, in Sunday School, we focused on Mark 12:35-44.

MARK 12:35[ncv] As Jesus was teaching in the Temple, he asked, ”Why do the teachers of the law say that the Christ is the son of David? 36 David himself, speaking by the Holy Spirit, said: 
    ’The Lord said to my Lord, 
    ”Sit by me at my right side, 
       until I put your enemies under your control.” ‘ — Psalm 110:1 
37 David himself calls the Christ ‘Lord,’ so how can the Christ be his son?” The large crowd listened to Jesus with pleasure.

Jesus is making the point that He is the Son of God (as He has been saying all along. Sometimes, I forget this part of the bible:

LUKE 1:35[ncv] The angel said to Mary, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will cover you. For this reason the baby will be holy and will be called the Son of God.

It’s like there’s some sort of disconnect. On one side of my brain, Jesus is the son of Joseph but on the other side, I’m like, “Yea! Of course He’s the Son of God!” Those two don’t mix…. just saying. Do y’all every struggle with that? Without the virgin birth, let’s just add Jesus to the list of wanna-be Messiahs. This was important for Him to say. It was prophesied:

ISAIAH 7:14[ncv] The Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin[a] will be pregnant. She will have a son, and she will name him Immanuel.[b]

By embodying this, Jesus fulfilled yet another prophecy of the Messiah.

We continued reading…

MARK 12:38[ncv] Jesus continued teaching and said, ”Beware of the teachers of the law. They like to walk around wearing fancy clothes, and they love for people to greet them with respect in the marketplaces. 39 They love to have the most important seats in the synagogues and at feasts. 40 But they cheat widows and steal their houses and then try to make themselves look good by saying long prayers. They will receive a greater punishment.”

 41 Jesus sat near the Temple money box and watched the people put in their money. Many rich people gave large sums of money.42 Then a poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which were only worth a few cents.

 43 Calling his followers to him, Jesus said, ”I tell you the truth, this poor widow gave more than all those rich people. 44 They gave only what they did not need. This woman is very poor, but she gave all she had; she gave all she had to live on.”

The conversation shifted a bit. I was very encouraged by our discussion. What is our identity as Christians? Some people hear the word “Christian” along with hurts caused by people bearing that title; others hear the word, “Christian” along with the grace, mercy, and love that they have received from people bearing that title.

 

How do we define Christianity for others regardless of their past experiences? We stand in a unique place because we can redefine the hurts some people have felt by honoring the name we bear… the name of Christ.

 

Should we just do the bare essentials or should we dive deeper like the widow that gave everything she had? On one hand, we see legalism producing people that do things on the surface but do not embody the spirit of the message. On the other hand, Jesus highlights the purity of heart seen a person such as the widow.

 

When we think about tithing, should we be thinking about what is “enough”? If people gave 10% under the law, how much should people under the spirit give? Should it be quantified? We all concluded that it shouldn’t. When we try to boil our lives as Christians down to certain limits, we miss the whole point.

 

We live by the Spirit and as such, we will not give our 10 percent but then ignore our brother/sister when they need something because we’ve “already given” RATHER, by God’s grace, we will embody that interruptible spirit Jesus walked with. He was never so narrowly focused that people couldn’t approach him unscheduled. Does that make sense? We shouldn’t have to fit goodness into one part of our calendar or budget. We should always be listening for the new things God wants us to do with our resources in order to aid our brothers and sisters.

JAMES 1:15[ncv] A brother or sister in Christ might need clothes or food.16 If you say to that person, “God be with you! I hope you stay warm and get plenty to eat,” but you do not give what that person needs, your words are worth nothing. 17 In the same way, faith by itself—that does nothing—is dead.

 

May we embody the SPIRIT of God so that we may redefine Christianity for those who have been hurt and also encourage those who have been uplifted by Christianity.

Tha stages of Christianity

We come first doing a lot

Paying God back for our sins with

daily devotions

scriptures on our walls

regular church attendance

The  Holy Spirit uses these disciplines

And by His power

These disciplines help us to come out of the pit

These disciplines help change us.

Pride sets in

We begin to boast in our strength

We look down on others like we don’t remember

what we were like two years ago.

The Father comes and knocks us off the hill

And so we learn

Saved By Grace through faith

Not by works lest any man should boast

So we  boast all the more in our weakness

We know that we rely on God’s strength.

Hatred becomes compassion.

Superciliousness becomes understanding.

Pride becomes repentance.

The first becomes the last.

Suddenly… there He is.

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